- Susan Weiner Investment Writing

When do you push proper usage on your writing clients?

January 31, 2017/in writing/by Susan Weiner, CFA

Some battles over proper usage in writing are worth fighting. Others are not. When should you push your clients on proper usage? If you write or edit for investment, wealth management, or other financial services firms, you’re likely to grapple with this question.

By the way, when I say “usage,” I refer to a host of issues that sometimes get lumped under “grammar.” In addition to grammar, it includes punctuation, spelling, and other issues of writing style.

When I say “clients,” I include internal clients—such as subject-matter experts or bosses—for staff writers and marketers, in addition to the clients of external writers and editors.

I usually point out improper usage. However, I divide usage issues into three categories. The seriousness of the category dictates how strongly I fight my client on an issue.

Category 1. Embarrassing or unethical mistakes

If your client writes “they’re” instead of “their,” it’s a no-brainer to insist on a correction. “They’re” instead of “their” is flat out wrong. These battles are usually easy to win. It’s best to treat them lightly, with the comment along the lines of “Oops, a typo sneaked in. It’s hard for all of us to proofread our own work.” I may also insert a link to an article explaining usage practices the client may not know.

Susan Rooks, Grammar Goddess, agrees with me about correcting outright mistakes. In response to my LinkedIn question about when to correct mistakes, she said, “When they will confuse others, or embarrass themselves or their company. While I do worry somewhat about punctuation, I am more concerned with the words that writers use. Mixing up homophones, using the wrong terms, or not seeing the impact of negative language on readers are all worth going to bat for.”

On rare occasions, I run into issues of copyright infringement. It has always been an innocent mistake. The person didn’t realize that simply naming the source doesn’t give you the right to use any text, exhibit, or image. It’s important to push clients on these issues. Why? Because their mistakes could inspire the copyright holders to sue them, bringing financial penalties and embarrassment. You’ll find resources to educate your clients about “fair use” of copyrighted material in my article on “Legal danger for financial bloggers: Two misconceptions, three resources, one suggestion.” You’ll also find tips in “Credit sources fairly in your financial blog posts.”

If you’re in financial services, your client will presumably run content through a compliance review. If you know that certain content typically requires a certain disclosure, you can mention that. But the client’s compliance professional is the ultimate authority.

Category 2. Mistakes that hurt reading comprehension

Sometimes your clients produce writing that’s unclear because of its vocabulary, length, or organization. That’s not good for them or their company’s pursuit of marketing or educational goals.

Many clients express gratitude and relief when you streamline their writing. Some do not. Instead, they cling to their original wording, perhaps because of issues I discussed in “Why experts love bad writing.”

What can you do with stubborn clients? Here are four options:

Present evidence for making changes. My articles, “Seven Ways to Talk Your Financial Execs Out of Jargon and Bad Writing” (free registration with MarketingProfs required) and “Financial jargon killer: The Wall Street Journal,” make a case for better writing. You could also share well-written articles by experts whom your client respects. As with category 1, it’s wise to take a respectful approach. Suggest changes by presenting information that you say your client might not have known. As Bob Hughes, director at U.K.-based Grammar Ally, says, “Persistence usually works better then insistence: the persuasive, collaborative approach versus the adversarial. Most people – there are exceptions – welcome information they simply didn’t have before. This makes ‘support’ and ‘sharing knowledge’ preferable to ‘correction’, which is often taken to be drawing attention to something someone ‘got wrong’ rather than simply didn’t know.”
Meet your client partway. Figure out what your client cares most about. See if you can satisfy their needs, while also improving the writing. For example, if the client insists on using the term “Goldilocks market,” define the term parenthetically. You’ll find examples of this in “Plain language: Let’s get parenthetical.” If it’s just one sentence that’s a problem, consider presenting several alternatives to your client.
Appeal to higher authorities. Does your boss, or the person at the client company who pays your invoices, believe in good writing? They may let you overrule your subject-matter expert’s wording. But tread carefully if you take this approach. It may not make a difference if the expert never sees the text again. On the other hand, if the expert sees it, it could create ill will.
Cave in. In other words, pick your battles carefully. Some things aren’t worth fighting over, especially if they’re small problems in an obscure part of a well-written document.

Category 3. Mistakes that don’t inflict major damage

Some mistakes bother me much less than others. These are typically mistakes that hurt reading comprehension less than others. For example, excessive capitalization of titles is common in financial services.

I often see “Jane Smith, President and Chief Investment Officer” instead of “Jane Smith, president and chief investment officer.” That’s wrong, wrong, wrong. Words that are capitalized to stress their importance drive professional writers crazy. The use of initial capitals in “President and Chief Investment Officer” does slow reading comprehension slightly. But its effect is small compared with the effect of a sentence that improperly uses “they’re” instead of “their.”

When I have clients who use excessive capitalization, I inform them about the proper practice. Then, I let them decide about what to do. I save my energy for more important battles, which typically fall into Category 2.

Image courtesy of imagerymajestic/freedigitalphotos.net

Note: On Jan. 31 I edited this post to correct a typo.

Financial white paper writers who say “yes”

April 5, 2016/2 Comments/in white paper/by Susan Weiner, CFA

Do you want a financial white paper writer who says “yes” to everything you write or suggest? I say “no.” Financial white paper writers who push back can be the best friends of companies that aren’t familiar with how to write great investment or wealth management white papers.

Don’t get me wrong. Your white paper writer should respect your goals and desires. However, the best financial white paper writers will push you to create the best white paper possible. They will say “no” when your white paper is weak in the areas I discuss below.

Weakness 1. Problem identification and WIIFM

If your white paper doesn’t identify a problem experienced by your target audience, then it’s not going to attract prospects or convince referral sources to pass along your name. You need to answer the question of “What’s in it for me?” (WIIFM) for your prospects. You should also understand the WIIFM for your business.

For example, imagine that you pose the topic of “401(k) plan types.” Who cares? That sounds like a dull reference work that could only interest an ERISA attorney or defined contribution recordkeeper. But how about “the 401(k) plan characteristics that boost participation and simplify plan administration”? That’s a winner that will help both participants and the plan sponsor. If your firm helps plan sponsors achieve those characteristics—or if this topic enhances your credibility as a provider of related services or products—then this topic helps you to achieve your business goals.

A good writer will ask the following questions early in their discussions with you:

Who is your target audience and what do you want them to do after reading the white paper?
What is your topic and why will your target audience care about it?
What problem does this topic solve for your readers?

When you and your writer get the answers right, you can attract and retain readers’ attention. Your readers won’t ask “Why the heck are you telling me this?”

Good white papers focus on solving problems, not promoting the firm that publishes them, as I explained in “White paper marketing: Walk a fine line.” If you truly seek a white paper, your writer should say “no” when your draft becomes a brochure.

Weakness 2. Poorly explained concepts

Your experts know what they’re talking about. But sometimes it’s hard for them to explain their ideas in plain English. As a result, your readers won’t appreciate the value of what you write in your white papers.

Take for example, the concepts of “asset allocation” and “diversification.” These are easy for investment professionals to understand. However, they require explanation and perhaps even some examples to make sense to less sophisticated individual investors. A good white paper writer won’t hesitate to push you on this.

Weakness 3. Poor organization and wording

Poor organization and bad wording will confuse your readers. They may even drive them away.

When you give a weak outline to good writers, they’ll fight back. They’ll propose a new, stronger outline that will let your ideas shine. They’ll also polish your wording.

Look for financial white paper writers who say “no”

You need a white paper writer who’ll be responsive to your needs. Sometimes that means saying “no” to the way your ideas are presented. That’s part of the value that good white paper writers bring.

Image courtesy of digitalart/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Force yourself to write or wait for inspiration?

March 22, 2016/in writing/by Susan Weiner, CFA

Procrastination can be good. That is the startling point of “Why I Taught Myself to Procrastinate,” an opinion piece in The New York Times. Its author, Adam Grant, a professor of management and psychology at the Wharton School, argues that procrastination “is a virtue for creativity.” His article made me wonder about writing. Should you always force yourself to write, or is it sometimes better to procrastinate, to wait for inspiration?

Let me confess. I take writing deadlines seriously. I finish my projects early whenever possible. I’m not a fan of waiting for inspiration, which is my personal definition of procrastinating about writing. However, in this article I consider both sides of the story.

Why procrastinate?

Grant’s interest in procrastination was inspired by one of his graduate students. “She told me that her most original ideas came to her after she procrastinated,” says Grant. He and his student tested whether her experience applied more broadly. Their experiments suggested that “procrastination encouraged divergent thinking.” Why? Because it gives us a chance to move beyond “our first ideas, which are usually our most conventional.”

Of particular interest to writers, Grant reports on his experiment in procrastinating about writing his opinion piece about procrastination. Here’s what he found:

What I discovered was that in every creative project, there are moments that require thinking more laterally and, yes, more slowly. My natural need to finish early was a way of shutting down complicating thoughts that sent me whirling in new directions. I was avoiding the pain of divergent thinking — but I was also missing out on its rewards.

Clearly, procrastination sometimes pays. Still, what Grant described doesn’t fit my definition of procrastination. I think of procrastination as putting off beginning work on a piece. Instead, Grant focuses more on not finishing a piece at the earliest opportunity. In fact, he started thinking about the piece early, giving him time to come up with new ideas for it. To me, that’s a form of preparation for writing. It’s productive procrastination, unlike the unproductive procrastination of people who wait until the last minute to do any work at all on their projects.

Why you shouldn’t wait for inspiration, but can delay final draft

When my schedule permits, I like the idea of starting early but delaying the final draft. This is especially true for my creative work, such as blog posts. It is in line with what Grant suggests. I found evidence supporting this in Wired to Create: Unraveling the Mysteries of the Creative Mind by Scott Berry Kaufman and Carolyn Gregoire. The authors describe Picasso’s creative process:

Exploration and seemingly blind experimentation were key to Picasso’s creative process. Rather than creating a painting to reflect his own pre-existing worldview, he seemed to actively build and reshape that worldview through the creative process. While he may have had a rough intuition, it’s likely Picasso did not know where he was going, creatively, until he arrived there.

I also like the idea of “creative incubation,” discussed in Wired to Create.

Many of us know from experience that our best ideas come seemingly out of the blue when our minds are off wandering elsewhere. Idle though it may seem, the act of mind wandering is often anything but mindless. Research suggests that an incubation period of mind wandering leads to improvement in creative thinking. The next time you’re working on a creative project or work assignment that requires intense focus and creative chops, try taking a five-minute daydreaming break every hour or so, and see how it affects your ideas and thinking. During this break, engage in a simple activity that will allow your mind to wander, like walking, doodling, or cleaning. Consider this your creative incubation period and see if you feel a renewed sense of creative energy when you get back to work.

Why force yourself to write?

One reason to force yourself to write is that waiting until your deadline nears is stressful. I regularly see my writer friends on Facebook lamenting their last-minute pressures as they hustle to finish articles that they put off until the last minute. Sometimes they lose face with their editors when they ask for extensions.

Another reason to force yourself to write is that “Research has shown that waiting for inspiration doesn’t work,” according to Paul J. Silvia in How to Write a Lot: A Practical Guide to Productive Academic Writing. He reports on a research study that tested the effectiveness of three different writing strategies:

Abstinence, in which subjects “were forbidden from all non-emergency writing”
Spontaneous, in which subjects scheduled writing sessions “but wrote only when they felt inspired”
Contingency, in which scheduled writing sessions “and were forced to write during each session,” plus “they had to send a check to a disliked organization if they didn’t do their writing

People in the contingency group wrote far more than their peers in the other two groups. In addition, people in the contingency group reported fewer days between creative ideas than members of the other two groups, according to Silva.

Can you be creative without delay?

There’s a difference between procrastinating and taking time to prepare before you write. I believe in starting your writing early enough that you can spend time brainstorming, using techniques such as mind mapping or freewriting. When you start your draft early enough, you can let your ideas marinate.

Don’t wait for inspiration. Instead, start thinking early about your article. Follow a process to develop your ideas, write your draft, and edit. Most people will find they like the results and experience less stress.

Of course, we all have different personalities. I’m sure there are people who enjoy last-minute crunches that they’ve created for themselves. Just as there are things that I do that no one else would want to impose on themselves. Find the solution that works best for you.

Image courtesy of lekkyjustdoit / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Blog post template: Write about a talk

February 9, 2016/in blog, writing/by Susan Weiner, CFA

Do you get tired of generating original material for your blog? Do you attend talks on topics that would interest your blog’s audience? If so, you can benefit from this template for blogging (or writing an article) about a talk. This blog post template will help you to spend less time thinking and writing. Plus, you’ll get better results from what you write.

This blog post template draws on my many years of blogging about presentations that I attended at the Boston Security Analysts Society. Plus, I also covered conference presentations as a staff reporter for Dalbar’s Mutual Fund Market News (now Money Management Executive) and as a freelance writer for Advisor Perspectives. If you’d like to learn more about writing blog posts, check out my financial blogging class.

Here is the process you can follow to apply my blog post template:

Introduce your topic
Give credit
Make at least one point
Write your headline

Step 1. Introduce your topic

Don’t make the mistake that too many amateurs do. Don’t kick off your article by saying “I went to a talk and it was great.”

Instead, start by sharing the speaker’s topic or main point. For example, I led with “‘U.S. economic growth is recovering robustly, receiving the usual cyclical boost from housing and inventories,’ said Dean Maki” in “Recovery will be stronger than consensus, says Barclays Capital chief U.S. economist,” a 2009 blog post. This quickly told the reader what they’d learn in the piece.

Doesn’t that beat the heck out of an introduction that lacks substance? For example, I can imagine an inexperienced writer starting with something like the following: “I went to one of the Boston Security Analysts Society’s excellent lunch presentations for Boston area investment professionals where Dean Maki, managing director and chief U.S. economist of Barclays Capital spoke and I got some great insights into the U.S. economy.” Yes, I’m exaggerating how badly most people write. However, I bet that you’ve read plenty of blog posts and newsletter articles that started similarly. Still, I am grateful that those authors take the time to credit the source of the observations that follow their introductions. That’s far better than presenting someone else’s ideas as your own.

Step 2. Give credit

If you pick up some great ideas at a talk, it’s good to give credit to your source. Just don’t write it in the way that I’ve parodied in the preceding paragraph.

Name the speaker, the title of his or her presentation, the sponsoring organization, and the date, if applicable. This information helps your readers to assess the credibility of the information in your blog post. The date will cue in the reader if information cited in the presentation is no longer current.

Here’s how I gave credit in the first paragraph of the Maki post:

“U.S. economic growth is recovering robustly, receiving the usual cyclical boost from housing and inventories,” said Dean Maki, managing director and chief U.S. economist of Barclays Capital in his “U.S. Economic Outlook” presentation to the Boston Security Analysts Society (BSAS) on December 8.

In the Maki post, I covered steps 1 and 2 in my first paragraph. Then, I moved to Step 3.

Step 3. Make at least one point

When you report on a talk, you don’t need to cover everything the speaker says. Especially in a short blog post, it’s fine to focus on one point.

In the Maki post, I focused on the economy’s strength, the theme introduced in my first paragraph.

Here’s the structure for the rest of the post, in terms of points made:

Paragraph 2: Maki sees a strong recovery, in contrast with the consensus, because he doesn’t see tight credit as a problem.
Paragraph 3: He thinks strong growth will be driven by these factors.
Paragraph 4: Here are his specific predictions for the economy.
Paragraph 5: Maki sees two things that could derail his predictions.

Here’s the flow of the piece, in terms of the actions I took:

State the speaker’s main opinion.
Provide supporting evidence.
Go into more detail about what the information covered above means.
Provide information about what could go wrong.

Here’s a generic version of my blog post template for you to follow.

State the speaker’s main opinion.
Make your first point. For example, you could describe the main piece of supporting evidence offered by the speaker. Or, you could describe the first of the speaker’s three main suggestions. Or, tell a story that illuminates the speaker’s main opinion.
Make your second point. For example, you could explain the second piece of supporting evidence offered by the speaker. Or you could explain why you disagree with the speaker’s main point.
Make your third point. For example, you could introduce a related theme discussed by the speaker.
Offer a conclusion or call to action. For example, if you’re an investment or wealth manager reporting on economic predictions, you might say how the predictions will influence how you manage money for your clients—or how the predictions should influence your readers’ behavior.

Step 4. Write your headline

It’s often easier to write your headline after you’ve completed writing your entire blog post or article. Writing may help you to identify your main point so you can feature it in your title. For the Maki post, I chose “Recovery will be stronger than consensus, says Barclays Capital chief U.S. economist.”

In addition to highlighting the main point, I included Maki’s corporate affiliation. I chose that over his name because I figured that Barclays Capital had better name recognition.

Apply this blog post template to a longer article

When you write a longer article, you may feel tempted to cover more of the speaker’s twists and tangents. You may also try to present the information in the order and structure used by the speaker. Sticking closely to the speaker’s approach may hurt your article or blog post.

Some speakers wander all over the place. That’s fine when you’re listening to an insightful, entertaining speaker. However, that structure doesn’t translate well into writing. I urge you to pick one theme and stick with it.

I ran into the problem of the wandering speaker when I wrote “Dan Fuss: The 50-Year Opportunity in Bonds” for Advisor Perspectives in Dec. 2008. Fuss held his audience rapt, but he rambled. He’s a leading thinker in the area of fixed income, so any speech by him is an opportunity to gain valuable insights. Still, his talk didn’t lend itself easily to becoming an article. However, along the way he made one point that riveted me: Opportunities in the bond market are as attractive now as they have been in at least 50 years.

The 50-year opportunity in bonds became the focus of my piece, which hit the top 10 list on Advisor Perspectives. I focused the article under two headings. First, “Treasuries overvalued, and investment-grade and high-yield attractive”; and second,”When will it end?”

Believe me, the talk Fuss gave was not as focused as my article. It’s fine for a talk by a leading thinker in the field to ramble. It’s not okay for a written piece. To fix the problem, I created a structure that didn’t exist in the original talk.

To identify the main themes for my article, I used mind mapping, which I teach in my book and my financial blogging class. Then, I used the mind map to organize my thoughts before writing the article.

Sometimes the most important decision you make in writing up a speech is what to omit. I ignored lots of my notes because they didn’t support my theme of the 50-year opportunity in bonds.

Try this blog post template

If you use my blog post template to write about a talk that you attend, please post a link in the Comments section of this blog. If you’d like more guidance from me on how to write this kind of piece, you can sign up for one-on-one coaching or my financial blogging class.

3 ways to make your emails mobile-friendly

November 3, 2015/3 Comments/in email/by Susan Weiner, CFA

Mobile-friendly emails are essential. Your clients, prospects, referral sources, and colleagues are increasingly reading emails on their mobile devices. If they don’t like what they see, they may delete or ignore your messages.

Here’s an interesting statistic from a webinar on “Demystifying Brand Journalism,” sponsored by the American Society of Business Press Editors:

80% of people delete an email if it doesn’t look good on their device.

I’m not a mobile guru, but I’ve noticed three things that encourage me to read emails on my phone.

Technique 1: Short subject lines that get to the point

No matter where your recipients read your emails, you’ll benefit from short subject lines that get to the point quickly. Your first two words are key, as I’ve said in “Improve your email subject-line vocabulary with The Hamster Revolution.”

“Short and sweet” is even more important on mobile devices, which may show as few as 15 characters of your subject line vs. 40+ characters on a traditional computer. Wearable devices could make things even tougher, as explained in “What effect could wearables have on email marketing?” by Wynn Zhou on memeburn.

Technique 2: Use mobile-friendly formatting

Traditional emails, especially multi-column e-newsletters, may be too wide to display well on mobile device. Below is an example of an image that’s too big to be mobile-friendly.

I believe that traditional text-only emails will fit well on your mobile device, although you should still do your best to make your email short and easily skimmed.

If you’ve been producing an e-newsletter for a long time, check to see if you can switch to a mobile-friendly or mobile-responsive format. I made the change earlier this year, using a template provided by Constant Contact.

Technique 3: Avoid attachments

Attachments and mobile devices don’t play well together. Attachments are a pain to download and even more of a pain to read on a tiny screen.

Want to share information beyond what’s in your email? Use a link to a mobile-friendly webpage.

YOUR suggestions?

What works to entice you to read emails on your phone? Much of what works on mobile devices also works on traditional computers.

Please share your insights. I enjoy learning from you.

Writing tip: Make your sentences more powerful!

October 6, 2015/in writing/by Susan Weiner, CFA

Make your sentences more powerful with the writing tip you’ll learn in this short video. It’ll take you less than two minutes to learn a valuable lesson.

This is a tip that I share in my presentations on “How to Write Investment Commentary People Will Read” and “Writing Effective Emails.” Contact me to learn how one of my presentations can help your company or professional society.

If you enjoyed this video, you’ll also like “Can YOU simplify investment commentary better than this?“

“Within” vs. “in”

September 8, 2015/2 Comments/in writing/by Susan Weiner, CFA

You can usually replace “within” with “in” to streamline your writing. “The change almost always improves a sentence,” as Bruce Ross-Larson says in Edit Yourself: A manual for everyone who works with words.

However, there are exceptions. For example, as Michael Strumpf and Auriel Douglas say in The Grammar Bible:

An event that will take place in an hour will occur will occur at the end of sixty minutes. An event that will take place within an hour may occur any time between the present and sixty minutes from the present.

Ross-Larson describes when you must favor “within”:

Within should be used when the object of the preposition is an area or space—and as a synonym for inside of, as in limits.

Did you understand this distinction? I confess that I had to do research to learn about it.

Disclosure: If you click on the Amazon link in this post and then buy something, I will receive a small commission. I only link to books in which I find some value for my blog’s readers.

Credit sources fairly in your financial blog posts

September 1, 2015/in blog/by Susan Weiner, CFA

You want to do the right thing when you find an interesting idea, statistic, or quote that you use on your blog. That means crediting your source. How much information must you provide?

Citation rules for blogs aren’t as clear as for books, where sources such as The Chicago Manual of Style lay out rules. I’ve developed suggestions for you based on my experience, Ann Handley’s Everybody Writes: Your Guide to Creating Ridiculously Good Content, and other resources.

1. Figure out if you’re entitled to quote the material.

Copyright and the concept of “fair use” govern your rights. The guidelines are murky. One key idea is that if you use the “heart” of the work, you’re in trouble, as explained in the “Amount and Substantiality of the Portion Used” on the University of Minnesota’s “Copyright Information and Resources” page.

You’ll find more “fair use” tips and resources in “Legal danger for financial bloggers: Two misconceptions, three resources, one suggestion.” Some sources may have their own guidelines, as discussed in “Are you crediting your OECD data properly?”

In another example, Hubspot asks that you limit quotes on your website to “no more than 75 words. This is to prevent duplicate content issues that would impact both our own organic search rankings and the other website’s,” according to Corey Eridon’s “How to Cite Sources & Not Steal People’s Content on the Internet.”

2. Name and link to your source.

At a minimum, you should name the publication or resource that’s the source of your information, whether it’s a blog, newspaper, conference presentation, or something else. Some people minimize the information, saying something like “according to The New York Times.”

I like to go further than that, naming the article and, possibly, the author.

3. Link to the source.

It’s courtesy to link to the source you’re crediting, assuming it’s available online. If your compliance professionals are uneasy about links, then make sure you follow the advice in my next tip.

4. Provide enough information for your readers to find the source on their own.

I’ve struggled with how much information to put in a citation. Then I read the suggestion in Everybody Writes that you should provide “enough information about the author and the work that someone could easily find it if the original link breaks.” Ann Handley made this suggestion in Everybody Writes’ chapter on content curation, “Curate Ethically.” I think it should apply to citations in blog posts in addition to content curation.

Handley also warns readers against linking to other people’s content using nofollow links—links that deprive the author of the linked material of a boost to their search ranking. I agree. It isn’t fair.

Providing enough information might mean giving a link to “Susan Weiner’s post, ‘How a blogging buddy can help your financial planning or investment blog’” instead of “Susan Weiner’s blog.”

Strike the right balance in giving credit to your sources!

A smart, fair strategy will boost your credibility.

Disclosure: If you click on the Amazon link in this post and then buy something, I will receive a small commission. I link only to books in which I find some value for my blog’s readers.

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Financial writer’s clinic: fact vs. interpretation

July 28, 2015/in writing/by Susan Weiner, CFA

Fact or interpretation, which should you place first in your article, commentary, or blog post? You’ll find a useful model in Justin Wolfers’ “A Better Gauge Shows Steady, Dull Growth,” which appeared in The New York Times.

Which is more intriguing?

Let’s compare your reactions to two sentences from Wolfers’ article.

The Bureau of Economic Analysis on Friday revised the nation’s gross domestic product to a new estimate that it contracted by 0.7 percent in the first three months of the year from its initial guess that the economy grew over the winter at an annual rate of 0.2 percent.
The government reckons that the American economy shrank over the winter, but no one really believes it.

Ask yourself these questions:

Which sentence is more intriguing and more revealing of the writer’s opinion?
Which sentence is easier to absorb, in terms of writing style and content?

To me, it’s clear that #2, the author’s interpretation of the data, wins as the answer to both questions.

When #2 is the introductory sentence, it snares readers’ attention and sets them up to absorb the GDP information presented in #1. This is how Wolfers starts his article, as you see in the image.

Unfortunately, too many financial writers drone on and on about the facts before they get to the interpretation. As a result, they fail to attract readers. Also, they quickly lose the readers who start to scan their articles.

I’m not saying you should never start an article with a fact. That works sometimes, especially when it’s a startling fact. In any case, it’s good to quickly mention your interpretation or give the reader a reason to care about your topic.

“The Upshot” as a model

Wolfers’ article appeared as one of the columns in The New York Times’ “The Upshot” columns of news analysis. If you read the columns, you’ll get more ideas for structuring your articles.

For example, Wolfers’ articles is structured as follows:

Author’s interpretation of the topic
Specific data point
Criticism of how the data is calculated
Suggestion of alternative data
More criticism of the data
What all of this information means for how we view the economy

Can you see how you might apply this approach to your next article, blog post, or investment commentary?

Use personal stories to make your content pop!

June 18, 2015/in writing/by Susan Weiner, CFA

“How can I make my content stand out, especially when I’m competing with companies with big names?” Participants in my writing workshops often ask me that question when I survey them as part of my preparation. You may grapple with the same challenge.

Your personal stories are unique and can make even the dullest topic come alive.

As an example, I share below my tips for snaring a seat on a commuter bus, which originally appeared in The Boston Globe. I don’t know anyone else who could have tackled the topic as I did.

Strategy is key, at the bus stop and in the market

By Susan B. Weiner

Most folks who know us think my husband and I work hard at our jobs in Boston’s financial services industry. And we do. But they haven’t seen true concentration until they have watched us jockey for seats on the express bus heading home during rush hour.

Our bus stop on Federal Street is a major hub of commuter activity. There’s ample room for six buses to pull up along the curb of the spacious plaza, which fronts the headquarters of one of Boston’s largest financial institutions. A big crowd clusters there during the evening rush, each weary worker hoping that his or her bus is the one gliding up to the curb.

It’s then that my investment management training comes into play. When our bus arrives, we don’t just board it. I’ve worked with my husband, Allan, to create a plan to achieve our goals, just as an investment counselor would work with clients. Short term, we want a double seat on the bus so we can talk side-by-side on the ride home. Our long-term goal? A happy marriage. Presumably our onboard talks about the day’s work will contribute to a close partnership.

Risk tolerance? High for achieving the first goal, low for the second. Assets? We’re both analytical and determined. Liabilities? We’re both nearsighted and short. We can’t count on spying our bus ahead of the, crowd. Nor do we have the bodies or faces to scare potential competitors out of our path. My curlyhaired, rosy-cheeked husband is more likely to crack jokes than to scowl.

As in investing, strategy is key. If l arrive first at the bus stop, I ponder the situation as intently as a securities analyst looks at her industry. My mission: to figure out where the next bus will pull up, so I can position myself. I want to be the first person on the bus, so I can grab a double seat, a prize almost as delectable as a double-digit increase in stock price.

When my husband arrives, he knows that he should look for me not at a fixed meeting spot, but where we reckon the next express bus for Waltham will open its doors.

It’s not easy to figure. That downtown corner is the assembly point for half a dozen express buses that travel the Massachusetts Turnpike. The buses come in no particular order. Some financial commentators complain that sector rotation in the stock market is vicious—financial stocks win one week, consumer staples another. But they haven’t seen anything like the random nature of bus arrivals. It’s Newton Corner…Newton Corner…Brighton…Watertown…Riverside. Often it feels as if the Waltham bus I’ve placed my stake on doesn’t come often enough.

The buses pull in at different spots along the curb. Sometimes they’ll stop only to roll on their “out of service” signs and cut their engines, because they’re early. Just as stock prices can’t rise without a catalyst,a bus driver can’t leave ahead of schedule. At least not without special dispensation from a dispatcher.

On occasion, I catch a clue from the dispatcher as he waves a hand to direct a bus. A dispatcher’s gesture can move the crowd, just as an upgrade from an influential analyst might spark a run-up in a stock.

Other times, there’s only one opening on the block, so the bus’s destination is obvious. On other occasions, I’ll analyze the bus as it angles toward the curb. I think of that as the bus world’s equivalent of technical analysis of stocks—both involve the velocity and directional pattern of the subject.

But just when I think I’ve perfected my analytical skills, a bus driver will fake me out by parking in an unexpected spot. It’s as unpleasant as a negative earnings surprise by a company that’s overweighted in my portfolio. As they say in mutual fund advertisements, “Past performance is no guarantee of future returns.”

When Allan finally shows up at the bus stop, there’s only time for a quick kiss. “I’ll wait behind this bus. You go back there,” he’ll say. We split up to improve the odds of getting first crack at seats together. My husband calls this “diversifying our assets.” We both know that diversification increases rewards while reducing risk.

“There it is!” I’ll yell sometimes, if enthusiasm gets the best of me upon spotting my quarry. But just as the highest rewards go to the first investors in a stock gathering momentum, the best seat goes to the bus analyst who discreetly signals, using a raised hand or a mere wink.

Allan tries to join me without alerting our fellow commuters. Once the bus is spotted, others will pile in, as investors piled into the dot-com stocks of the 1990s. I persevere. I’ve become adept at twisting my body to fit into openings without jostling my competitors. Sometimes I reach the hard blue plastic seats before my husband can get on the bus. Like any investor, I work hard to lock in my gains. Placing a bulging briefcase on the seat next to me will often be enough. Otherwise, I repeat my mantra to those who ask if the seat is taken: “My husband is sitting there; my husband is sitting there.” Soon enough he’ll appear.

Actively managed stock portfolios struggle to beat the performance of the Standard & Poor’s 500 index. The level of competition for double seats at rush hour runs just as high. It feels terrific when Allan and I succeed. I’m flushed with excitement as my husband drops happily into the seat next to me. Finally, I can relax.

Image courtesy of Adam Hickmott at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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