Quit being passive: A grammar tip

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If you reduce your use of the passive voice, your writing will become more powerful. That’s something I often tell my writing students.

If you can’t recognize the passive voice, check out the passive voice resources highlighted by Barbara Feldman in “Active and Passive Voice.”  Don’t be put off by the “Kids” in Feldman’s column title. She’s referring you to websites appropriate for adults.

According to the Guide to Grammar and Writing’s “The Passive Voice” page

In the active voice, the subject and verb relationship is straightforward: the subject is a be-er or a do-er and the verb moves the sentence along. In the passive voice, the subject of the sentence is neither a do-er or a be-er, but is acted upon by some other agent or by something unnamed (The new policy was approved).

In my opinion, the active voice has a couple of advantages compared to the passive voice

  • It shortens sentences
  • It clarifies the relationship between cause and effect

If you’re not sure you can recognize the passive voice, take the Guide to Grammar and Writing’s passive voice quiz, “Exercise in Revising Passive Constructions.” 

Some of the other resources mentioned by Feldman include

What your kids can teach you about writing

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“My kids learned that in school.” I’ve heard that comment several times after my writing workshops. Schools are teaching mind mapping to help children to organize their thoughts before writing. That’s why I use it, too.

If your child talks to you about mind mapping, consider learning more from them about this technique. Your daughter or son may be able to teach you a useful skill. Based on what my friends tell me, schools typically teach mapping in second or third grade. Instead of mind mapping, they may call it idea mapping, concept mapping, semantic mapping or writer’s workshop.

I never write a long, complex article without mapping my information first. Mapping makes me a more efficient writer. Try it, you may like it.

CFA Magazine on social media and your career

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“Stepping Out: Digital Footprints Can Make Or Break a Career” by Rhea Wessel appears in the Nov./Dec. issue of CFA Magazine, starting on page 34 of the digital edition (page 32 of the print edition). 


It’s a cautionary tale that quotes several CFA charterholders including yours truly. It even refers indirectly to my “Top five tips for financial advisors dipping their toes in the Twitterverse.“


Here’s the bit that quotes me

“Don’t land yourself in hot water by starting to blog before you consult with your compliance officer,” she says. “However, you can get an idea of industry norms by studying bloggers whom you respect and who work in positions similar to yours.”

Registered reps, it’s time to ‘fess up

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Ghostwriters offer valuable marketing support to financial advisors. But some registered reps–and the marketers who support them–have felt confused since the issuance of “Misleading Communications About Expertise,”  FINRA Regulatory Notice 08-27,  in May 2008. They don’t know how much editorial assistance reps can receive before they must acknowledge the assistance in writing–or even sacrifice their byline.

At least one compliance officer is interpreting the rules relatively strictly. Paul Tolley, chief compliance officer of Commonwealth Financial Network in Waltham, Mass., says that registered reps should disclose the role of any other writers who contribute to text for articles or books that a rep would like to distribute under the rep’s name.  That’s much stricter than the informal advice I received from some financial marketing writers when I drafted “FINRA’s limits on registered reps use of ghostwriters,” an earlier blog post on this topic.

FINRA’s “Misleading Communications About Expertise”  says, “Registered representatives may not suggest (or encourage others to suggest) that they authored investment-related books, articles or similar publications if they did not write them. Such a publication created by a third-party vendor must disclose that it was prepared either by the third party or for the representative’s use.”

Tolley thinks FINRA’s intentions are clear. “Few things in compliance are black and white, but this is one of them” he says. If the rep’s only contribution was to pay for an article, then the rep can’t take credit for the article. However, “Reps who pay for someone else to write an article can still put their name on it, as long as the actual author is credited,” says Tolley. An appropriate byline might be “Submitted by Rachel Registered-Rep and written by Glenda Ghostwriter” or “Written for Rachel Registered-Rep by Glenda Ghostwriter.”

But what if the registered rep contributes content and editorial guidance to a ghostwriter? For example, what if a ghostwriter pens an article based on interviews with a registered rep? Can the registered rep claim authorship?

“What it really comes down to is that you can’t say it if it’s not true,” says Tolley. If reps are 100% responsible for the text of an article or other written communication, they can claim sole authorship.  If not, they should disclose the details of who contributed what, he says. For example, if someone writes an article on the basis of content and editorial review provided by a rep, the article’s byline should include the writer’s name in addition to the rep’s. “The rep can’t claim sole authorship because it’s not true,” he adds. However, a byline such as “By Rachel Registered-Rep with Glenda Ghostwriter” could work, as long as Rachel truly contributed to the writing.

Tolley says that it’s probably okay for a rep to send an ghostwritten article to a newspaper  with a note that it was “submitted by Joe Smith,” when Joe Smith is not the author. However, I doubt that most newspapers would accept this. They’d want to credit the real author.

On a related note, “In accordance with Notice 08-27, if a rep is merely paying for a publication that is designed to look like a magazine, article or interview, the material must be clearly identified as an advertisement (typically by including the word ‘Advertisement’ at the top center of the publication),” says Tolley.

Registered reps, it’s time for you to ‘fess up, if you’re not really the author of your bylined articles or books.

Background of FINRA rules
Tolley says that FINRA’s approach to ghostwriting has its roots in Conduct Rule 2010, which says that all FINRA members, “in the conduct of its business, shall observe high standards of commercial honor and just and equitable principles of trade.”

But ghostwriting first became an issue in 2007. That’s when FINRA became aware of reps who, as part of their marketing to seniors and retirees,  paid to have their names presented as authors of books written by others. “FINRA made it clear they thought that was a violation of conduct rule 2210 and just and equitable principles of trade,” says Tolley. FINRA expressed its views in Regulatory Notice 07-43 “Senior Investors: FINRA Reminds Firms of Their Obligations Relating to Senior Investors and Highlights Industry Practices to Serve These Customers.”  In 2008, as mentioned above, FINRA extended that explicit prohibition beyond communications aimed at seniors, so it applies to any ghostwritten materials.

What about registered investment advisors?
I’m not aware of any rules governing the use of ghostwriters by registered investment advisors (RIAs).  Should there be? I’d like to hear what you think.

Thank you, NAPFA MA Study Group, for your great response to my email/letter writing workshop

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The NAPFA MA Study Group asked lots of great questions during my November presentation to them on  “How to write effective emails to your financial planning clients.” Thank you, NAPFA members and guests, for your energetic participation!

Here’s some of their feedback.

  •  “I found this presentation very helpful in the sense that it focused on key elements to being an influential but understandable advisor.” 
  •  “Susan’s presentation brought to life the benefits of better writing.”
  •  “Great tips for jump starting my client communications”
  • “Susan’s presentation made me want to go back to my office and juice up my emails and letters.”
  • “I learned how to make my emails and letters more reader-friendly, how to simplify technical information, and how to entice people to actually read the email.”
  • “I have been making presentations to Fortune 500 companies for 20 years. I wish I had taken Ms. Weiner’s course years ago!”
  • “It was a very good presentation. I found it very useful and helpful….I learned how to simplify sentences, how to emphasize client’s interests, and how to structure emails or newsletters.”
  • “I feel like I now have a variety of tools available to write better emails, letters, and all correspondence.”

Now I can’t wait for my next opportunity to present this workshop to financial advisors!

Financial writers, lead with your message, not your source

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Sometimes you go to a conference or talk with an expert and return to your office with a message you’ve just got to share. That’s great. But in their enthusiasm, financial advisors often make the mistake of starting their article or blog post with the name and credentials of the expert or conference, instead of their message. 

Here’s a made-up example of this common mistake. It’s the kind of problem I often see in advisor-written articles.

Last month, Jane Miller, an estate planning attorney with 30 years experience, gave a great talk at the Anytown Library about estate planning for families including children with special needs. Jane practices in Nexttown with the firm of Miller, Brown, and Lopez. I’m going to share some of her main points with you.

Let’s assume this paragraph went out in a client newsletter. Do any clients care about Jane, where she spoke, and the identity of the partners in her law firm?  Maybe some do. But I’ll bet the families with children who have special needs care a lot more about the details of Jane’s advice.

I suggest rewriting the beginning of the article to focus on the message, rather than the source.

Sometimes your clients’ best-intentioned efforts to help their children with special needs may backfire, as I learned in a presentation by attorney Jane Miller of Miller, Brown, and Lopez. There are three steps you can take to help your child financially, while maintaining their access to means-tested programs.

Do you grasp the difference between the two approaches?

Unless you’re reporting on your one-to-one meeting at the White House with President Obama or your Hollywood meeting with the hottest movie star, start your article with your strongest message.

 

Use a tip sheet to get PR for your financial business

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“Tip Sheets: One of the Most Effective Publicity Tools You’ve Never Heard Of” tells you how to use this PR tool to get exposure for your business. A tip sheet is a list of tips on how to do something.

I like that the author quotes PR maven Sandy Beckwith, who taught me almost everything I know about tip sheets. You can go to Sandy’s website to read more detailed instructions on how to write a tip sheet.

If you’ve got old tip sheets, you can update and reissue them. That’s a tip I got from one of Roger C. Parker’s Published & Profitable teleseminars.

Five great writing tips: They’re not just for ads

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Even if you’ve never looked at Twitter and you’ll never advertise, you should take the time to read “what can Twitter teach us about advertising?” (sorry, this article is no longer available).

The IDTAGS blog’s five tips include

  1. Be brief.
  2. Be impactful.
  3. Less is more.
  4. No one likes to read.
  5. Just give us the headlines.

That almost sums up what I spend 60-180 minutes discussing in my writing workshops.

If you visit theIDTAGS blog, you’ll see the power of brevity combined with visual images.

Thank you, @MarkRaganCEO, for pointing me to this IDTAGS piece.

Thank you, Boston Women in Finance, for your feedback on my writing workshop

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Boston Women in Finance gave me great feedback on my workshop “How to Write What People Will Read About Investments.” Before I share some their feedback with you, I’d like to thank all of the participants. Your energetic participation made it a very enjoyable workshop for me, too.

Here are some participant comments.

  •  “A very practical workshop! You’ll get tips you’ll use as soon as you return to the office.“
  • “I truly learned a lot from this presentation. It was refreshing to have someone break down how to best reach people and to say it’s okay to write in simple short sentences.”
  • “It’s always good to hear these reminders to get you back to the basics of effective writing. This seminar was a great way to refocus.”
  • “The mapping technique was helpful. I will use this for brainstorming and helping with project plans and meetings.”
  • “Susan’s ‘how to’ approach packed dozens of indispensable tips into 1 1/2 hours. Incredible!”
  • “I believe the mapping exercise will help me organize my thoughts and overcome writer’s block and get past the first blank page or screen.”

Some of you said that you would prefer “More time; more opportunity for individual exercises.” I’m interested in creating longer, customized training sessions for corporate clients that would allow more interaction. I’m also for hire to present the one-and-one-half hour version I delivered to Boston Women in Finance.

Twitter to the rescue of my colleague with a RFP dilemma

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Twitter can be mighty handy in a pinch. Especially when used in combination with other social media. That’s what I learned from the response to my colleague’s RFP dilemma.

My colleague asked me to post his dilemma on my blog, so I wrote it up as “RFP dilemma: What should my colleague do?“ I figured that a blog post alone wouldn’t draw helpful responses, so I tweeted–and emailed some colleagues on LinkedIn–for help. 

Within an hour, I received five constructive comments on my blog post plus some tweets.The exchange raised some issues that I’d never thought of before. For example, the fact that an RFP may be considered part of a contract.

This illustrates social media at its best. 

Thanks again to everyone who contributed to the conversation!


Nov. 13 update: A reader recently asked “What’s an RFP?” 

RFP is short for request for proposal. It’s a questionnaire that businesses fill out to compete for a prospect’s business. 

In the investment industry, institutional investors often use RFPs in their investment manager selection process. You can read more about this topic in “How to Create an Investment Management Request for Proposal.”