Quick email tips for financial advisors and clients in my guest post

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You can snare some quick tips for advisor-client email communications in my guest post for the KBK Wealth Connection blog.

The tips boil down to

  1. Get to your point quickly
  2. Keep it short
  3. Organize clearly

Visit Kathleen’s blog for more details.
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Susan Weiner, CFA, writes and edits articles, white papers, blogs, investment commentary, web pages, and other communications for leading investment and wealth management firms. She has presented “How to Write Emails and Letters Your Clients Will Read” to great reviews by financial advisors.  

Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved

BNY Mellon: I liked your "truth ad" until you used that word

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BNY Mellon Wealth Management has a catchy new print ad asking “Can you handle the truth?” 

I love the simplicity of “Can you handle the truth?”

You can view one version of the ad on BNY Mellon’s website (no longer available). However, I first saw this family of ads in the print version of The Wall Street Journal. 

Print vs. online ad
The Wall Street Journal version uses the same big “truth” box, but it is mostly better than the online version.

It’s better in the sense that much of its text is simpler and more direct than in the online version. I imagine that individuals seeking financial advice would find it very appealing. Let’s compare the two versions. 

Print version

The truth is most investors’ portfolios did not handle the past years’ market volatility well. A more alarming truth is that most plans have not been changed to mitigate future risks or capture opportunities.

We have helped many investors with an honest assessment of their current portfolio and plan. May we help you?

The first sentence is disarmingly honest. At least in my eyes. 

The language charmed me until I got to “mitigate.” If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you know I don’t like “big words” and “mitigate” is one of my pet peeves. Why couldn’t the writers substitute “ease,” “cut,” “reduce,” or even “manage” for “mitigate,” depending on what they meant? I suspect that a lawyer or compliance person pushed for “mitigate.”


Online version 
The first line of the online ad’s text–which you can read in the indented section below–is much stiffer and institutional. It doesn’t sound like something a human being would say in conversation. I’ve italicized the words I don’t like in this ad’s text below.  

The rest of the text is better. I like the second sentence. However, in the fourth sentence, “complimentary analysis” suffers when compared with the “honest assessment” of the first ad. Also, “please contact us” isn’t as appealing as “May we help you?”

Fundamental changes in the financial landscape have rendered many investment plans null and void.

Your plan may be one of them.

Let us help you learn the truth about whether your portfolio is positioned for the years to come.

To get started with a complimentary analysis of your investment plan, please contact us.

 

NOTE: updated 11/18/24 

Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved

My May blog posts by category: Blogging, economy/investments/wealth management, marketing, social media, writing

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Did you notice that I went wild in May, posting every day as part of the Word Count Blogathon? For your convenience, I’m listing my May posts by category.

Blogging

Economy, investments, and wealth management

Marketing

Social media

Writing

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Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved

The two most important words are…

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Copyblogger Brian Clark’s lessons in “The two most important words in blogging” apply equally to any form of marketing communication. Pay attention because using these words will make your communications more persuasive.

See if you can guess the two words before you surf to Copyblogger’s site. If you have attended any of my presentations on writing, you should know one of the two answers.
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Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved

How to write subheads that command attention

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Copyblogger Brian Clark accurately notes in “How to write exquisite subheads” that subheads can turn scanners into readers.

I especially like his advice that a subhead should “express a clear and complete benefit.”
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Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved

Executive’s lesson for your communications with clients and prospects

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Financial advisors who want to communicate effectively will follow the example set by Bill Carter in “The Scoreboard Can’t Tell You Everything.” Carter’s lesson boils down to this: Put yourself in the mind of the person with whom you’re communicating.

Here’s what Carter, partner and co-found of Fuse, said in his interview with Adam Bryant of The New York Times:

In terms of communication, I think that I do my best to try to step away from my own belief system and my own priorities, which are the priorities of a 41-year-old man who’s married and has a young daughter. Instead, I try to evaluate decisions based on what the 25- to-32-year-olds in our office are trying to get out of their career, what they want in a workplace. 

Your articles and conversations will be more persuasive when you phrase them in terms of what your clients, prospects, and referral sources care about. 

For example, say “Your interests come first because we don’t accept payments from product providers” instead of “We are a fee-only financial advisor.”

Do you apply this rule to your communications? Please share your examples.


Related posts
* Focus on features, not benefits, in your marketing
* Encourage good communication or lose your multi-generational clients

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Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved

Financial bloggers’ posts may violate copyright law

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Copyright law isn’t on the curriculum of most business schools or for CFP or CFA candidates. So it’s not surprising that I’ve seen well-meaning financial advisors unintentionally violate copyright law in their blogs. 

What NOT to do
You cannot copy someone’s entire  newspaper article or  blog post  word-for-word, then make it okay by giving credit to the author. This won’t suffice. Not even if you link back to the original article. You are violating copyright law. 

When in doubt, paraphrase
U.S. law allows you to quote part of a written work under the doctrine of fair use, which you can read about on the federal copyright website.

Fair use is a murky concept. “There are no legal rules permitting the use of a specific number of words, a certain number of musical notes, or percentage of a work,” as it says in the federal government’s FAQ on on “How much of someone else’s work can I use without getting permission?”

As the Copyright Office says:

If you use a copyrighted work without authorization, the owner may be entitled to bring an infringement action against you. There are circumstances under the fair use doctrine where a quote or a sample may be used without permission. However, in cases of doubt, the Copyright Office recommends that permission be obtained.

Your safest course is to simply paraphrase or summarize the article that interests you, while also citing the source. It’s courteous to provide a link to the article, if it’s available online.

Using quotes very selectively will keep you safe, while protecting other authors’ copyright.
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Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved

Start with a good lead, or lose your reader

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“…the lead is the doorway into every text. Its job, never a minor one, is to draw the reader over the threshold,” says Francis Flaherty in The Elements of Story, p. 201.

The lead, also spelled lede, is the first sentence or paragraph of your blog post or article.  Write a weak lead and you may lose your audience at the very beginning of your piece.

When you write your lead, Flaherty suggests you ask “What lead will prompt in the reader the most irresistible questions, questions powerful enough to propel him through that doorway and into the story?” p. 202.

When you write an investment or wealth management blog post, the most powerful leads often pose a problem faced by your readers and dangle the possibility of a solution. Have you written a powerful lead of this type? Please post a link to your blog post, so we can see how you’ve mastered the lead.

Plain English can bring your financial topic to life

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Must an article about how to prevent another Flash Crash be difficult to understand?

Not if you use plain English, as Floyd Norris did in “Time for Regulators to Impose Order in the Markets,” his May 14 column in The New York Times.

Here’s Norris’ first sentence: 
“If your machine makes a mistake that the dumbest human would never make, then maybe you don’t have a very good machine.” 

Even a child can understand Norris’ lead sentence. Norris created an image in my mind that made it easier for me to follow the rest of his column about the changes he believes are needed for the New York Stock Exchange.

The next time you write an investment or financial article, try to use plain language to introduce your topic. Your readers will thank you.

Related posts
* Financial writers clinic: Lessons from Floyd Norris of The New York Times
* Vary your paragraph length like New York Times columnist Floyd Norris
* Financial writers clinic: Rhythm can help you

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Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved

If you enjoy my #CFA2010 tweets…

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…you may also enjoy my free monthly e-newsletter with practical tips for your client communications. You’ll also find at least one investment or wealth management article. 

I often report on presentations to the Boston Security Analysts Society, so you know you’ll see topics of interest to CFA charterholders.

Topics in the May 2010 issue included

  • Watch out for inflation, says veteran value investor, Jean-Marie Eveillard
    Treasurys vs. Treasuries–Which is the right spelling? 
  • How to guest-blog on personal finance or investing 
  • Poll: How do you sign your business emails? 
  • Last month’s reader poll about ghostbloggers 
  • Morgan Creek Capital’s Yusko on investing

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Receive a free 32-page e-book with client communications tips when you sign up for my free monthly newsletter.  

Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved